I could not stop thinking about a girl
Thank you for everything.
Thank you for all of your help and devotion and everything you did for me with so such calm and tranquility. You really help me and I really feel the changes that I underwent during the treatment.
I know that when I first came to you I was very upset; I could not stop thinking about a girl I knew and the thoughts wouldn’t leave me. I knew that she really liked me, and I was very excited about it – after all everyone likes to feel that he or she is liked.
Like any teenage girl I was very excitable – perhaps more than others. However, this was constantly on my mind because I knew she wanted to be my friend even though we had not been introduced.
During one of the treatments, I shared the story with you and how much it bothered. I told you what a hard time I had concentrating in school: about how I imagined that I might see her in the yard outside the classroom and, consequently, how I found it hard to stay in class. At one of the following sessions, you burst my balloon. You brought me down from the clouds and helped me back to reality. At that time I was doing exams and it was crucial that I do well since my acceptance to a place in higher education depended on the marks to these exams. My mind was now free of the disturbing thoughts, and I was now able to concentrate and do well in school.
There are not enough words to thank you for this and a number of other things that you helped me with.
Homesexual feelings and depency on other perople
I started with TAT with Eliezer because of homosexual feelings and my dependence on other people. Before these treatments, for many years I felt bad about myself and couldn’t manage to live in tranquility. Since these treatments, I feel that both these things have been resolved for the best; that is, that now I feel much more independent, and the attraction to men is finally gone. Before the treatment, the love I felt for one of my friends was strong, but not so healthy; now it is love that is building in a healthier and more correct manner.
These are my problems:
Dependence on boyfriends (homosexual): for a number of years, I was dependent on my boyfriend (from time to time I changed boyfriends). This dependence included missing him terribly, thinking about him all the time, not doing certain things around him or doing certain things specifically around him, anxiety about how I appear to him, emotionalism, etc. All these things caused me unrest and no peace of mind and a dysfunctional daily life.
Sexual attraction to men: I was attracted to men and often became dependent on those that I was attracted to. This caused a lot of problems and a lack of concentration.
Dependence on parents: I always talked as they would, even if I didn’t think the same. I didn’t want to portray myself as different from them; I was afraid they would be hurt.
These are the principle problems I had, problems that caused me to feel that I am not truly myself, but someone else. These problems also caused a lack of concentration and a lot of stress.
Since treatment, I feel much freer and much less pressured. I feel the life I’m living is truly mine and not because of friends and those around me. I feel more tranquil and relaxed, without thinking about missing my boyfriends. I am much more focused. The attraction to men is greatly reduced; I don’t feel emotionally attracted to men anymore. Concerning my dependence on my parents, I say what I think and am not afraid of my image concerning my dear parents.